Had you asked me 10 years ago if there was such a thing as "trying too hard," I would have growled, "Fuck no. You could never try too hard," then promptly returned to gargling glass, or whatever self-imposed fertility torture I was engaging in.
Ask me that question today and you will get a dramatically different answer.
Getting my ass kicked on the regular by this journey taught me some empowering shit about the notion of "trying."
First off, the word TRY, upon closer inspection is kinda gross.
It implies a level of powerlessness.
It suggests an element of doubt.
It's sopped in barf worthy wet noodlely-ness.
Honestly, when was the last time you actually felt powerful and confident when you said you were "trying" to do something?
As Jedi Master Yoda says, "Do. Or do not. There is no try." (Empire Strikes Back.)
Second, there is a tipping point when your valiant efforts mutate into a loathsome combination of victimhood and martyrdom--the dynamic duo of misery.
AKA: Trying too hard.
The tell tale signs include gems like:
- Lack and scarcity based decision making,
- Shiny-object syndrome (chasing after shit whether it makes sense or not, with the attention span of a gnat and ZERO strategy),
- Promiscuously handing your power to other people,
- Chronically starving yourself of pleasure in the name of "the cause,"
- Recalcitrant commitment to the D.I.Y. approach--when it isn't working, AND
- Looking at the state of your life and asking, "Can someone please remind me why the fuck I'm doing this???"
Trying too hard stinks of fear...it's repelling.
DO with love for yourself.
DO with love for your baby.
DO with empowered ease.
My ladies DO.
They know "trying too hard" is the exact opposite of the confident HELL YES that makes them Mamas!
Decide you will be one of them.
Change your mindset, change your results.
Intrigued? Here's an exercise to take this to the next level...
Stop "Trying"...too hard.
1) Eliminate the word "try" from your vocabulary on this journey. It's equivocal and wishy washy. Just DO. DOERS make success inevitable. Instead of saying you are "trying to conceive," consider saying, "I am/We are in the process of conceiving"--it sounds waaaaaaay more certain and empowered.
2) Evaluate the "too hard" aspect of your journey. Are you caught up in a story that this journey has to be hard? How might you live this chapter of your life with more ease...more joy...more fun?
You might not believe me right now, but if you are "trying too hard," you have the power to change that TODAY. Explore this! The most interesting and exciting things happen when you do...xoxoxo
**EXCITING NEWS: MY ALL NEW PODCAST IS COMING SOON!**