Isn't getting caught up in a What-If spiral the worst?
As a former prosecutor, with countless complex jury trials under my belt, it became part of my DNA to think 15 steps ahead of my opponent, anticipating and planning for What-Ifs like a mofo.
While that made me an assassin in the courtroom, it left me writhing in the agony of What If-ing myself into abject terror on my fertility journey.
What If the doctor, distracted by a fight with his wife before my retrieval, misses some of my precious eggs?
What If the heels I wear are causing my uterus to tilt in a weird way, sabotaging my embryos' valiant efforts at implantation?
What If Dr. X was right? I should be eating venison! Where the fuck can I get my hands on some venison??? Is it even deer season?
What If God is punishing me for wanting it all--can I really have it all?
Those What Ifs barely scratch the surface of the masochism once exercised by my twisted, negativity indulgent imagination.
It all seemed rational at the time, but years later, having defied the odds using the power of mindset, I realized I had been going about the What If game all wrong.
I discovered that not only can you neutralize What Ifs with a SINGLE RESPONSE, you can actually use them to your advantage.
Yes, use them to your advantage.
It starts with you telling yourself the WHOLE truth about your What Ifs.
They have an undeniably negative bias.
They are intellectually dishonest--ignoring an equally possible positive outcome.
They PRESUME POWERLESSNESS on your part.
Quit worshipping at the altar of negative What Ifs--it's boring and covered with spiders.
If you are trying to pull a rabbit out of a hat on this journey, you can't afford to waste a second of your time with any of that go-nowhere bullshit.
Your new approach, if you wish to accept it, is simple:
A: I will find a way.
Feel free to be rude and intolerant with your What Ifs. (They are like a self-righteous asshole going 55 mph in the fast lane!)
Put your faith in YOU, not them.
Next week I will teach you HOW to use What Ifs to your advantage.
Focus on this step first.
You will kick What If's ass in no time.
My ladies are What If assassins.
They don't waste their precious time or miss out on opportunities with questions that distract them from their inherent power to triumph.
Decide you will be one of them.
Change your mindset, change your results.
Intrigued? Here's an exercise to take this to the next level...
A What If CHALLENGE!
1) For the next 7 days I challenge you to answer every one of your boring, negatively biased, gross What Ifs with a sassy, self-assured AF: I will find a way!
2) If you are up for the challenge, reply to this email with this simple statement: Rosanne, I am IN AF.
3) Track your progress with your What Ifs. By Tuesday of next week, send me another email with a progress report--What did you notice about yourself with this challenge?
Make your What Ifs submit to your Badass Bitchery--when you get good at this, you'll feel like fucking Wonder Woman!
**Want more inspiration from me? FOLLOW ME ON INSTA @rosanneaustinfertility