The Get Naked Ritual For Loving the Infertile Skin You’re In

As Gorgeous As A Lab Rat

Poked, prodded, bloated, cranky, heartbroken, and engaged in a terrifying level of intimacy with a sonogram probe, knee deep in my fertility journey, I felt about as gorgeous as a lab rat. My skin broke out, my pants were tight, and I had a couple small bald patches on my scalp from my vengeful thyroid hurling a big “f*%$ you” at me as a result of all the fertility drugs (this was the worst, since my hair is my thing.) Buried under the stress of treatment, the ravages it bestowed on my body, the repeated disappointments, and having to “hold it together” at work as a sex crimes prosecutor, I had never, ever felt worse about myself. When I looked in the mirror, I saw a disgusting failure.

Then, one morning as I was about to get into the shower, instead of cursing what I saw staring back at me in the mirror, I paused and took a good long look. Feet planted on the cool marble floor, I let my eyes drift over my entire body. I saw my spotty skin, poochy belly, remnants of needle pricks from my Lupron shots, and the bruises on my lower back/butt (which felt like hard boiled eggs trapped under my skin) from the progesterone injections. As I stood there, I thought to myself, “This is me. For better or worse, this is me!” For the first time on my journey, I began to authentically accept myself and my body. It felt fantastic.

Taking a moment to be grateful for my body quickly became a ritual. Ritualistic conceit? Not even close. Just a practice of being grateful for what I have, what I have become, and most importantly remembering that I am so much more than my infertility.

Infertile Skin

 

With practice, here’s what I finally had the courage to see:

  • A woman who is loved by the most fantastic man in the world
  • A woman who has the unwavering support of her family
  • A woman who is a loyal friend and trusted confidant
  • A woman whose heart is big enough for every stray animal she sees
  • A woman who dances with the reckless abandon of someone who is seriously unhinged
  • A woman who has endured test after test, procedure after painful procedure with a heart filled with hope
  • A woman with the strength to lift herself from the darkness of a miscarriage
  • A woman who knows she is just fine exactly as she is, baby or no baby!

Get Naked, Turn A Corner

Next time you are getting ready to jump in the shower, take a second to look in the mirror. Instead of criticizing your thighs, shouting abuse at your poor uterus, or swearing at your ovaries for not getting with the program, look at your body with the loving eye it deserves. This is the only body you’ve got baby, learn to love it! If you are feeling so down that you can’t think of anything to love, here’s some places to start:

  1. Do you have lustrous shiny hair?
  2. Is your skin as smooth as a silk?
  3. Got to die for eyes?
  4. Loving your luscious lips?
  5. Legs for miles?
  6. Pretty perfect feet?
  7. Bodacious booty?
  8. Is there something your body did particularly well during your last cycle? Thick cushy uterine lining? Nice number of eggs?

Have fun with this! GO CRAZY. Start with a freckle if you have to. Invest a few seconds here and there–make time, not excuses. Give your body the credit she deserves! Like you, she’s doing the best that she can. Your body is the gift God, the Universe, chance, or whatever you believe in has given you. Mean Girls suck. Don’t be one. Make your own list of what you have the courage to see. Do this!

Practiced faithfully, with your whole heart, this ritual of gratitude will become second nature.

You will love the infertile skin you are in!

Tell me one thing you love about your body in the comments below!! Think this ritual might help someone you know or love? SHARE IT LIKE CRAZY!

With Love and Respect,

Rosanne

© 2014 From Maybe To Baby

9 thoughts on “The Get Naked Ritual For Loving the Infertile Skin You’re In”

    1. LOL, Kristen it does take some getting used to. If it’s easier, just focus on your hair and eyes. Maybe that’s the only reminder you need of how lovely and unique you are. There is something about this journey that causes us to really feel down and unattractive. Keep this little ritual in your back pocket for when you really need it!!

    1. Thanks for stopping by Brandi! Getting comfortable in your skin isn’t always easy, particularly when you are being kicked around by infertility. The point however is to have the courage to see yourself for who you really are on the journey. Loving the skin you are in takes a little practice, but it is oh so worth it!

  1. It takes a lot of courage to do what you have done! It is definitely not easy for me to do at the moment… Maybe one day- hope it comes soon!
    You are an amazing woman!
    Wishing you the best of luck 🙂

    1. Liga! Thank you so much for stopping by. This practice isn’t easy, but start with teeny steps. Maybe a dimple? A freckle? Anything. This is the only body you’ve got! 🙂

  2. Hmm, something I appreciate or like about my body?? Good question. As women we are trained to be so negative to pick out flaws we have so that we can “fix” them.
    I love my eyes. I think they are pretty cool. 🙂

    1. That is awesome…some people feel weird about picking even one thing they love about themselves! Now the trick will be to pick something new to love. Remember, it’s not ritualistic conceit, just gratitude!

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